It has finally dawned on me that, after having been drugged and raped, a lot of damage occurred in many areas of my life. What is healthy sex? God says that it happens within the confines of marriage. But even there, can sex be healthy and unhealthy? Does it have to do with motivation, relationship? Desire and control?
Sexual health: is admitting to and being at ease with one’s sexuality and the roles of each sex. Having healthy interactions between people of the same and opposite sex. Treating people for who they are, as individuals, without overcompensation or distraction due to sex, is sexual health.
But healthy sexuality is much broader than that. Luther considered marraige to be the ultimate expression of worship toward God. Let’s look at the beginning of this definition “at ease with one’s sexuality”.
The first thing to admit is that today; society is sick. Why are so many trying to confuse masculinity and femininity? Why is MAMBLA and LBGwhatever being taught to our children? Why do so many adults want to confuse a child’s innate development of sexuality? To me, a victim of rape by a man twice my age, the answer is obvious. Fresh meat is at a premium. What is grooming? Grooming contains the lies we hear that weakens our God given purity and natural resolve leading us down a path of unhealthy thinking and damage in any area.
In the area of sexuality, it can be anything from distasteful jokes, discussions, touching, soft porn, etc. It can take place in the classroom, on television, in groups or privately. It is anything designed to condition an arousal and break down the God installed resistance to abnormal sexual advances. The purpose is to convince the victims that the activity was the victim’s idea or at least that they were willing participants and enjoyed it.
Why is there even a discussion of sexual orientation in grade school? A healthy child, growing up in a healthy environment should have no experience or concept of sexual deviance. In the days when we all grew up on farms, breading was a part of life. If we wanted to increase the heard, we knew how to do it. There was no question as to sexual identity, all one had to do was to look between one’s legs to discover if one is male or female. That’s how we tell all animals apart.
Having figured that out, let’s try to figure out the next step. What does sexuality mean? Men and women are quite different from each other. We think differently, we feel differently, we respond to stimuli differently. God made us different for a reason – and the differences are far greater than reproduction. Unfortunately, I grew up in a society where no one talked about these special and unique differences – except for the plumbing. As we lose the definition between men and woman, we lose God’s design for us. I wonder if that is their plan.
Marital. What is a healthy marriage? A healthy marriage is a man, committed to God, and a woman, also committed to God coming together in a lifetime union. This forms a triad. It is a man, with God, and a woman with God in a relationship blessed by God. No human entity can reproduce this. Communication is a key factor in any relationship. If communication is broken, the relationship is broken. Only communication can restore a broken relationship.
As one considers all this, I hope one can understand why I place sexuality and marriage in the highest pyramid group. It takes a lot of fortitude and understanding to grow and teach. It takes a lot to partner with someone for life. It takes a positive and a negative to make electricity work. It takes two people, working toward health to produce healthy children.
Sexuality is a lot more than bumps, lumps, curves, hormones and emotion. If one were to look up sexuality in the encyclopedia, one would find a quick mention of these things, but the primary discussion concerns a few specific body parts and the act of impregnation. Wrong. We have already discussed some of the differences between men and woman, but true sexuality encompasses the entire being.
I walk the halls where I work. I hear three woman talking rapidly in a foreign language. I am reminded that woman are primarily relational creatures and they love to talk. I hear another woman talking in her southern accent. I think how different she is from the first three. The purpose of the game here is to get to know the other person in all aspects of life. Hopefully to find commonality where lives can be shared.
Those magazines presenting pictures of abused and mistreated women, trying to stimulate an arousal in men have no idea of what the reality of true partnership with another is. True sex is so much more.
8) Financial